Beth+Newman

=Exploring the Intuitive Mind=

Beth Newman
The intuitive mind is a sacred gift and the rational mind is a faithful servant. We have created a society that honors the servant and has forgotten the gift. – Albert Einstein

Those individuals referred to by our society as "gifted" are most often misunderstood and sometimes reviled when compared with what is thought of as the norm in dominant cultures of today's world. The motivating factors and experiences of these people that serve to drive them down different roads in life are very poorly understood and documented. I argue that there is a great need to gain further understanding into what leads so called "gifted" individuals to create, write, produce, or do whatever it is that provides catharsis for them so that we, as a society, may learn to value and cultivate the contributions of these unique personalities. Through personal interviews, examination of documents and products, and photographic representation I hope to add to the small body of knowledge that defines the intuitive mind.

Article Reflections for 11-22 (Beth Newman)
After I read Carol's comments, I just had to come back and add a sentence to my reflections about the sense of oppression felt in both of these articles. It's always there like an undercurrent in almost every paragraph. Maybe that's what causes the strong sense of uneasiness I get when I read these pieces.

Visweswaran

What struck me most throughout the reading of this article was the continual sense of conflict and discomfort experienced and described by the author. She never seems to feel at peace with herself or the world around her. I found that aspect of it quite disturbing. Like my classmates, I enjoyed the section entitled Hyphe-Nation and thought it interesting that Visweswaran suggests that "the hyphenated ethnic identity in the U.S. however has more often than not marked a move toward the center." I really had always considered those using a hyphenated identity as seeking to somehow differentiate themselves from the center of American life and culture and trying instead to cling to an aspect of their inheritance that would somehow explain or occasionally excuse their actions. Seeing hyphenation as an attempt toward the center, interpreted by me as acculturation, is just the opposite of how I have always previously viewed it.

I also really liked the quote from Hussein used in this piece stating that "what is even more curious about a hyphenated pair of words is that meaning cannot reside in one word or the other, but can only be understood in movement." That is a really succinct way of stating the meaning of this whole piece! Individuals caught between two different cultures, races, ethnicities, or whatever cannot be understood as static forces in either realm. Rather, they are constantly shuffling back and forth consciously and unconsciously between the two. They will never only be part of one world, but always switching or combining membership in both. It cannot be a static relationship.

All things considered, this was not an easy read, but thought provoking and worth the effort both as an example of research and as a commentary on cultural experience.

Chaundhry

This piece was a much easier, but no less moving read for me. Again, I felt uncomfortable throughout and could easily sense the high levels of emotion and conflict involved with each vignette. The observation made by Chaundhry in the first vignette that she was "struck by how American the competitors are in their body language, their accents, and their demeanors" and that "most of us who were actually born and raised in Muslim or Third World countries huddle further into our seats" held a great deal of meaning I thought about how much distance their really can be between individual experiences. The second vignette was compelling and like some of my other classmates, I wondered about whether Chaundhry should really be involved with these people, her research participants, on a level so personal that she is actually drawn into participation in their lives. The last vignette was most interesting for me and I attribute this to its autoethnographical nature. It really seems to give the most insight into what it is really like to be a female Pakistani Muslim researcher completing an education in the U.S. You are able to share Chaundhry's emotions on several different levels. It's almost like watching life take place by peering into a crystal ball. It feels intrusive and laden with guilt in some ways, but powerful too.

November 15

Thinking back on last week, I really enjoyed the autoethnography discussion and participation. It struck me that just when I think that qualitative research couldn't get more interesting and meaningful, it does! What could be more powerful than seeing or reading someone's well-written and heartfelt experience with the world? Dr. B's poem continues to hang in my mind. I haven't personally lived anything like what she has been through, but through the medium of the poem I can feel the enormous power of emotion and anger.

The poem I wrote (below) isn't nearly as good, but OK for a first attempt I think. It's funny how a major finding can be summed up, but at the same time not spelled out in words by a poem. The meaning is obvious even though it isn't stated and at the same time it leaves room for each individual to view and interpret from their own perspective.

November 2

I didn’t get a chance to read my poem last night and probably couldn’t have anyway since my voice is currently so shaky, so I thought I’d post it here. I was really amazed at the quality of the data that emerged from this exercise.

He grew up self-taught, self-made And sold tractors for 35 years. He had an //I can// attitude, It didn’t get too early, or too hot, or too cold. That meant improvising, Taking a nickel and doing the job of a fifty-cent piece. He was loving, kind, supportive His health declined.

I absorbed some of his better qualities. I didn’t have any prejudices. I didn’t have any hang-ups. I didn’t have any dark closets. That’s one of my most important accomplishments. = =

=November 1, 2006=

I hate to begin this entry by saying that I have been sick because I don't want it to sound like I'm trying to excuse any deficit in my work for this class, but since the purpose of these pages is to help others understand the content and process of qualitative research I've decided that it's very relative to know that I have been ill because it has affected my thinking and my research. I don't know what I've had, a bad cold, the flu, a stomach virus, or some insidious combination of these things, but whatever it was I've been dealing with it for about a week now. Undoubtedly, the stress of work and family obligations has influenced my ability to get well and my lack of an adequate immune system. Anyway, the point I'm trying to make is that qualitative research is mind draining work and if you're going to undertake a project using qualitative methods, you'd better be at your best mentally and physically because anything less just won't get the job done! I got about two hours total of audio interview for my inductive analysis project. To date, I have only been able to transcribe half of that. One hour. That's enough for the purposes of this class, but it isn't nearly enough to answer all of my questions. I can't wait to write up the other hour of my tape just to see what thematic jewels jump out at me! It's facinating work, but as I said before, mentally draining. I'm learning that I can only work with the data for short periods of time because after a while everything just seems to run together and you end up seeing categories and themes everywhere. It's better if I read through it several times a day and just make a note or two. When I do that, the words and ideas seem to come together in a more organized, concrete way in my mind and I can make better sense of them. That brings me to a second point I'd like to make. Qualitative research is VERY time consuming. You live with your data, at least in your head, all of the time. It's always there in the background as you go through the day. It takes time to understand the methodology, time to interview participants, time to transcribe data, time to do analysis, and lots of time to write, write, write.

A word on methodology.....I like phenomenology, because I do think that there is a common "essence" to most human experience and I think that recognizing and documenting those "essences" is valuable work. However, I'm quickly learning that I have a huge body of knowlege to become familiar with before I can properly use phenomenological methods to gain understanding. For this reason, I chose to stick with the codes, categories, and themes of grounded theory for my inductive analysis project. Honestly, this is working fine for me, but I'm not sure that it will take me as far into the data as I'd like to go. We'll see. I think that it was Sandy who brought up in class last week that feeling of inadequacy - like the further you go, the more there is to do. I'm still in the middle of those feelings right now. I can't see an end point. Dr. B has brought out often that you have to be comfortable with grey areas in order to do qualitative research. That's true in so many ways, not just with your findings but with nearly all of the aspects of the work from data collection all the way through the process.

= = = = =Information for Phenomenology Page= = = = = Who should use this?

This information should be useful to students, researchers, journalists, academics, and any other individual or group with a beginning interest in qualitative research and phenomenology. Those who wish to learn more about the origins, methods, and principal figures associated with phenomenology will find these pages useful as an initiation into this field of inquiry.


 * Why should you read this?**

It is our hope that this information will prompt those who read it to dig deeper and further their knowledge of phenomenology and its methods. If you are developing an interest in qualitative research, you will find that understanding the principles of phenomenology is essential to the development of a sound personal research methodology. These pages are not intended to give you all of the background that you will eventually need, but only to get you started on the road to a successful relationship with your research.


 * How will it be helpful to you?**

This information should be helpful to you in several ways. Firstly, it will present qualitative research and phenomenology from the perspective of graduate students who are somewhat familiar with its tenets, but who are also still engaged in the learning process and still becoming familiar with the hands-on process of using phenomenological approaches in actual research. You, as a student/learner, will be able to participate vicariously in the steps we take to make phenomenology an important tool in our qualitative research toolbox.

= = = = = = = = = = = = = = =Taxonomy= = = = =

Semantic Relationship: attribution Being unsocialized is an attribute of kids. Interacting with kids you don’t know is an attribute of a possibly dangerous stranger. A good morning kiss is a kind of hello and goodbye. Questions: What are other attributes of children? What other types of people can be described as unsocialized? What are other attributes of possibly dangerous strangers? What else can a good morning kiss mean? What are other ways of saying hello and goodbye? = = Semantic Relationship: cause-effect Paranoia is a result of watching the 6 o’clock news. Not asking enough questions is a result of respecting our elders.

Questions: What other effects are possible from watching the news? Are there other ways to cause paranoia? What other constrictions or beliefs cause us to not ask enough questions? Does respecting our elders cause other problems? Semantic Relationship: means-end Playing with a child you don’t know is a way to get into trouble. Kissing is a way to say hello and goodbye. Questions: Are there other ways to get into trouble? Does kissing have other meanings? Are there ways other than kissing to say hello and goodbye? What impression do you get of Alex as a kind of person/writer? I read some of Alex’s reflections on using a camera to take pictures of things that meant something to him or caught his attention. He took some photos of a young boy in a park while the parents were watching. I sensed from his writing about this incident that Alex is a very free-thinking individual who likes to just experience the world around him without a lot of societal constraints getting in the way. He obviously enjoyed interacting with the boy, but then realized that his actions might be interpreted in a threatening manner. Later, in the poem, “Father Government, Mother Media,” he elaborated on this kind of thinking by showing how the sayings and mores that we grow up with may end up getting us into trouble as adults. In the other poem, “Coming Off The Graveyard,” the same theme repeats itself in a way. The speaker would like to express himself/herself, but going to work, a necessity of the world we live in, gets in the way. So, I guess in summary I see Alex as a free spirit struggling to deal with the ways of the world and it’s many demands on our thinking and our time.Narrative


 * Wednesday Night at Two Mall Kiosks**

I am walking into the Oak Court Mall in Memphis, TN on a Wednesday night about 6:45 pm. It is a cool evening and the parking lot is not crowded. I go through the doors in the middle entrance and ride down to the ground floor on the escalator. The Sprint kiosk is located immediately to the right of the food court and tonight is staffed by two African American males and one AA female. The kiosk itself is circular in design and about twelve feet across from outside edge to outside edge. There is a counter-top about a foot and a half wide extending around the entire spot except for a small swinging gate on the side facing the food court which allows the attendants to enter and exit. The kiosk has a cash register, lots of cell phones, a charger station, and various types of written information. The AA female is dressed in khaki pants and a black Sprint shirt. She has long black hair worn in a swept up fashion, long fingernails, and no jewelry. She is leaning on the counter in a relaxed way with one hip against the counter. As I am observing, she leans over the counter and watches people walk by. She then turns and talks to one of the male AA attendants and starts waving her hands at him.

At 7:00 pm the AA female picked up a cell phone from the counter and began looking at it, turning it over in her hand and opening and closing it. She opened the cash register, looked inside, moved some things around, but did not take anything out. She walks across the kiosk area and plugs the cell phone she is holding into a charging station and leaves it there. The AA female then leans on the counter and again begins to talk with the AA male attendant. By this time the other AA male attendant has left the area. Her phone rings and she answers it, pulling it from her pocket and putting it to her ear. Again she begins to look at her fingernails and watch the mall traffic go by as she continues to talk on the phone.

At 7:08 pm I decide to move to another kiosk and so walk down the mall corridor and look for one with a more active and interesting setting. The Royal Accessories kiosk is located on the second floor at the western end of the mall building near the escalators. It is actually two separate kiosks that are located about ten feet apart. The kiosks themselves are rectangular in shape and about ten feet long and five feet wide with drawers all around and glass enclosed cases on the top to allow for viewing of the shiny jewelry that is on sale here. It is staffed by a middle-aged man with a balding head and large black mustache who appears to be of Middle Eastern or perhaps Indian descent. He is thin and dressed in dark trousers, a striped shirt, and sandals. Constantly in motion, he moves between the two stations monitoring and checking the displays.

At 7:11 pm he squats and looks into the bottom half of the case closest to the escalators then rises, turns quickly and strides back to the other kiosk with hands clasped behind his back. As he moves, he watches the passers-by for any sign of interest in his wares. Finally, he slows and turns towards one of the kiosk, walks to a bottom drawer, opens it, and begins rearranging the items inside looking up from time to time to glance at someone walking by.

=Field Notes=

= = 6:55 pm, Oak Court Mall, Sprint kiosk, small circular station about 12 feet in circumference, tall table-top or shelf with opening in the back, yellow and white Sprint colors, two or three African-American workers, two female, one male, two have black Sprint shirts with khaki pants, other in jeans and t-shirt, no chairs and attendants must stand, black mat on floor, one AA female relaxed stance, leans on counter, watching people go by, talking to AA male attendant, slapping and swinging hands, talking to AA female attendant 7:00 pm, AA female checking out phone picked up from counter, plugging into counter, looking in cash register, leaning on counter, talking with AA male attendant, answers phone, talking on phone and examining fingernails, watching mall traffic go by, leaning on counter talking on phone

7:05 pm, AA female swinging door, AA male talking to female AA customer…

7:08 pm, Royal Accessories kiosks, one male attendant, Indian or Middle Eastern dissent, putting items in sack from drawer, wearing striped shirt, dark pants, sandals, large bald spot, large black mustache, middle-aged, two kiosks walking between them

7:11 pm, squatting and looking into case, walking between kiosks, hands behind back, looking into case, watching passers for interest, walking, walking, watching, checking cases, rearranges items in drawer = = = =

= = = = =Initial Interview reflections=

I thought the interview was very smooth overall. There did appear to be a few instances when the interviewer was a little unsure about which direction to follow. The participant was quite forthcoming and shared willingly about how the writing process works for him. I was able to distinguish several types of questions during the conversation including structural, descriptive, and contrast. Once you understood what to look for, it was not difficult to distinguish between the three most of the time. Karen pretty much broke down the specifics in her reflections, so I won’t go into detail here. The knowledge being generated appeared, at least to me, to concern the writing process as it is experienced by Alex. One contrast question did ask him to compare his writing now to a time in the past. I wonder how he would have responded if asked to compare his writing or his writing process to someone well known, like Hemmingway for instance. I thought the wrap-up to the interview was excellent. The direction that would be taken next was outlined well and you just had a good sense of closure to this session, but also expectation for the next. OK, well we are now working on technology issues in this class. I very much like this Dell Latitude on which I am working and the wireless connection. How convenient!

I enjoyed tonight's class very much. I really did not think that I had any technology issues, and I'm not sure these are tech issues, but I discovered that we need to register and use a login on these pages and I also discovered that I had watched and commented on the wrong interview for tonight! We spoke briefly in class about getting information about taking comps, completing a residency, working on a dissertation, etc. It has always been my experience with the U of M that getting correct information on any process, such as those mentioned above, is difficult at best. The university really could do a better job supporting its students. I don't think this is a personal reflection on the staff, but rather indicative of problems within the realm of administration and student relations.On another note, I'm now looking forward to watching the //right//right video clip and posting new comments!

=September 20, 2006=

Hi all. I just wanted to let you know that I am working on my entry for tonight. The State of Tennessee's internet service to the school systems has been down since yesterday, so I have no internet access at work. This really is a hindrance since I find that I do my best thinking and writing in that environment. Anyway, I will hopefully be posting more later this afternoon before I head to class. See you there!

=**In-Depth Interview**=

When I watched this interview, it came across as quite strict and formal to my eyes. It seemed as if the interviewer was really reaching for a goal rather than just meandering around an issue. She asked questions that produced specific sorts of narrow answers rather than forcing the writer to look deep into himself and think about what he actually does as a writer. I don’t know that this interview really did a good job of answering the research questions or moving towards the research purpose, but the interview questions were responded to in detail.Obviously, a good part of this interview, with regard to the questions, had to be planned and thought out before-hand. There seemed to be a lot of structural questions in this interview and the writer seemed to spend a good part of the time explaining basic writing strategies that all writers go through and then applying them to himself. I don’t really know if this information helps to answer the question of how he perceives himself and his writing. There were also a lot of descriptive questions posed to the writer, some of which were simple and others more complex. For example, “What was it like for you to find your voice as a writer” or something similar, would be more reflective and require more in-depth analysis on the part of the respondent.As far as how I can use these strategies in my own interviews….When I took the qual 1 class, I thought I wanted to go with a more structuralist approach to my interviews, but now I am beginning to think that this style of interviewing doesn’t allow for the flexibility that may be needed in some situations to “get at” the heart of an issue. I can see using some parts of this approach and I like the idea of having well thought out questions prepared beforehand, but I also get a sense that it can be limited in scope.

=**Phenomenological Interview**=

In spite of the fact that this is the type of interview which appears to be the most difficult to conduct properly, I think that maybe I like it the best of the three. It does require that you have a very good idea of what you would like to accomplish with the interview even though you are going into the process in a necessarily blind manner because you cannot know where or with what exactly you will end. I do believe that there are certain “essences” to an experience, but that they are difficult to tap into because the participant usually isn’t aware of the essence or doesn’t want to acknowledge it for some reason. I think that this process also requires a very active listener and one who is able to move as seamlessly as possible from one idea to the next while always moving closer to the central experience of the respondent. It’s a lot to keep in mind during an interview!As I mentioned above, I think that I may be more drawn to this style more than I am to the other two. I doubt very seriously though that I am ready to attempt to conduct a completely phenomenological interview without using parts of the in-depth interview and the feminist interview. A question for me is can you actually recognize the essence if and when you get to it. Is there a danger of going right past this point in the interview and not realizing what has happened? Also, it would seem that you need to be careful not to go into this interview with preconceived ideas about what the other person’s essence of a situation might be. That’s difficult to do because we all look at the world through our own lenses.

=Feminist Interview=

Feminist InterviewAs I watched this, it was clear that Dr. B was most comfortable with this style. She is very obviously proficient with the other two, but from the beginning statements here you can feel the comfort level in the atmosphere going up. I think that this is an important point because the respondent naturally senses the comfort level of the interviewer and aligns himself or herself with it. For that reason it should follow that you will get your best data using the style that is most comfortable for you. The obvious difference in this interview was the participation of the interviewer in the questioning process. She related parts of her own experience and linked them to the writer’s. It would seem to me that establishing this kind of kinship might bring forth better data and encourage the respondent to be more open and forthcoming with better information. Keeping focus and direction might be a pitfall here and while it may look like a simple conversation on the surface, there has to be a lot of confidence and knowledge supporting this style of interview. The relaxed and friendly atmosphere here is enticing and I would like to be able to incorporate some of the conversational aspects into my interviews. This is because I have found that whenever you can establish a link or a commonality with a person that helps them view you as an individual, it invariably aids the process of whatever you are trying to accomplish.